image via mtv.com

Today we spell slacker K-E-L-L-Y. I let you all down. I neglected Team Brenda all week. The celeb sisters were wondering about The Hills…and I had nothing…because I was sawing logs. For this, I seek penance. All week I was as busy as a bumble bee. Doing what, you ask? Writing up some little ditties for socialitelife.com, a delight of a site that was tricked into letting me contribute. I wrote about Beyonce‘s reaction to Kanye‘s, um, “moment,” a new single off the New Moon Soundtrack, an update on NYC Housewives’ Bethenny Frankel and Khloe Kardashian‘s newest glossy cover (albiet Life & Style, which is a bit like a purchasing a Prado bag from Canal Street. Note to the rag readers: If you want gossip as close to the truth as possible, read only People and Us Magazine.)

My genetic defect of a sister won’t leave me alone and all I want to do is watch Glee. Leaf me alone! Go get me coffee!

Soooooooo today I’ve decided to round up my thoughts and feelings on this week’s television.

The Hills: Who OK’d the decision to make Stacie The Bartender a quasi-time character? Talk about adding nothing to the “show.” They’re better off bringing one of the Alexes on (although I’m not sure any of Cavallari‘s old friends speak to her anymore. I heard rumors. Yes, these rumors are four years old, but it makes for a great backstory. Laguna Beach, people! This is for you, Colleen. Bonus: I found a delicious new blog devoted soley to The Hills. Yayyyyyyy.

At any rate, off we go. Opening of Playhouse: No one seems to like Kristin. Huge, unscripted surprise. Then we witness something confusing. Something that has us digging into our foggy memory bank to recall the days of yore. I speak of clubs with slow dances. Does this exist? I don’t remember An Tua Nua slowing it down. The only time the music stopped was when Bwad busted his leg and the EMT needed some sort of light, any sort of life, to wheel the victim out to the street. Then, of course, 50 Cent returned to cradle us in his grill. Still, no slow dancing. Is it bad to say that I am getting a kick out of Spencer this season? Off-camera he’s unbearable, but when he’s in a controlled environment with direction, it works. Somehow it works.

Glee: “Ellen, that blouse is just insane.” Coach, nice track suit. The episode was good, but not at its greatest. We finally discover that Terri and Will are married because they were high school sweathearts. Well, maybe I discovered it now and everyone else knew since episode one. This makes total sense why Will is pining after Ellen. He married way too young and now he doesn’t even recognize who his wife has become. And Ellen. Oh Ellen. Coach Ken is nice enough, BUT YOU CAN DO BETTER. Living on opposite sides of town, a secret ceremony. Why? Why?

The Office-Holy bouncy ball of emotion, Jim Halpert. How do I find me one of you? This might have been the best wedding I’ve ever attended. Despite the decor and Youtube reenactment, the devotion Jim felt for Pam permeated through the television and my teeny-tiny discarded heart absorbed it. I watch too much TV.

Flash Forward-If you’re not watching, then you should start. Quite possibly the best new series this Fall. Bold statement? Nope. Not even a little. The footage of that one man at the baseball game makes my skin crawl. So good! What will happen next? Who is behind the blackout? Will everyone’s flash forward come true? Please watch. Don’t be an idiot.

Fame Whore night on E!: The Girls Next Door and Leave It To Lamos premiere. Make sure you watch. Preview the new gals and the Lamos family here.